Somehow you manage to get yourself wrapped up in the most pleasant of strange situations.

instead of just a big loser

now you're talking! you writing this down 3d?



if all that shit happened to me, I'd be waiting for the crew of Playboy TVs Totally Busted to come charging out to let me in on the joke.

Gnappy I think I ve said it before I have always go along better with women then I do with men , I just become good friends with them , I was always easy to talk to , so I was like great friends , and usually ended up being friends with benefits ,, then once I took over the family farm and other business's they liked that i had nice things and could take them out to eat and party and such , So I guess Im just lucky

where can I get me one of these family farms you speak of?

And more importantly, do they come with a baby-sitter, or do you have to get your own?

preferably with big tits

and bob, don't you already have the family auto something or other store?

well, yeah, but I sure as hell don't a baby-sitter around here anywhere.

Haha I can see it now:

DDD35: "So this concludes the interview"
Random female: "So did I get the job?"
DDD35: "Eh, I'll have to call you back."
Random female: "Oh btw, here's a pic of my tits, sorry they all couldn't fit on the picture. Price you pay for being well endowed "
DDD35: "Welcome to DDD's farm, first task is for me to.......*serious look* plow your field."
*cue cheesey '70s porn music*

Now on DVD "Book Keepers Gone Wild!"

NO DICE!



Ashton.... you motherfucker you got me!



you have watched too much bad porno my friend

Bad? Porno? no I dont get it

well i guess allot of it comes with the small town

youd have to find your own baby sitter , mine is taken , however I think think the ex book keeper above might be available , her hubby has been treating her like shit ,

oh yeah I have 2 new canidates for baby sitter now that mine went to college , and guess what 1 has big boobs one just has a great ass , lol i guess its the fact that we pay 7.50 and meals and they watch them here at our house that attracts the baby sitters , you see we have a large pool and hot tub , so they enjoy that .. and I enjoy the View ...

you might be close

It's a very fine line, but I discovered it does exist. Back when we were 18, some buddies and I rented some porn, for the novelty of it, and because net porn wasn't nearly as good back then. Anyway, we decided to rent the 6 hours of porn on one tape, cuz it was 6 HOURS, not the crappy 90 minute stuff with hot porn stars.
As it turned out it was bad porn.



$7.50 and meals? Where do I apply? But I get 3 popsicles out of the freezer too, right? And if I don't get the job, can I at least "supervize" the new sitter?

well the 7.50 isnt much but when most sitters get 2-3 per hour per kid the 7.50 is pretty good deal , and as far as hiring a male , probably not , but we might be looking for a pool man LOL

But it did have boobs in it though right?

What Gnappy said...

Typical guy, always going for quantity over quality

isnt that the male way ?

Yes sir

I thought as much

well boys the baby sitter called last night , shes been lifting wieghts , getting muscled up for softball , made sure to tell me her boobs are firm as ever ... and shes having a blast at college ...

PICS?!
(at least that's what you should have told her)

Does she go to college out of state? cuz then if you go bang her there, it doesn't count as cheating.

well she was a little tipsy when she called , its homecoming week at college and there partying big time , I told her I needed some pics in her softball uniform , her only comment was , Ill flex my assets for ya LOL


yes she is out of state but I dont think the wife will buy that aurgument ... specially since the main reason she called me was to tell me she would be home all next week on break ...

if you get any pics, it is your civic duty to post them here.

Ahh the old outta state rule



Failure to comply will result in us sending Puppet over to make a new boot out of your arse!

I will do my best but theres no guarantees .....

That really is "not a guarantee"

[attachmentid=30673]well I just got this via email from the sitter I have no idea who the other girls are , I assume her room mates , looks like homecoming week has gone well

I was going to ask which one was the sitter but I dont think I care, I'd do em all!!!

btw who are you the pope? Post their faces!!!

sorry Bondi , no faces , shes going to school to become a doctor . and shes in the red bra

holy shnikes! can you cc those emails to me??
I figured the red bra one was the sitter...she has the biggest funbags, but I would like to defile all three, preferably at once.




what a coincidence, maybe I could tutor her, cuz Dr. Tongue has arrived!


boy 3d, despite how everyone calls you an asshole when you're not around, you seem like an OK guy (as long as you keep posting pics like this)

That is all.

ok well show the other 2



Agreed!

welll to be honest I am a asshole just ask the guy Im sueing this month !!!!

I told you guys if I get the goods I would share , Im trying for nude but I cant be to open asking her for them , we have been pretty close to this point that might cause me some problems down the road ...

why didn't I think of that?



it's all about subtlety and vagueness of your intentions.

don't say "send me some titty pics!"

say something like "geeze, you guys look like you were having a crazy time, what did you do for an encore after that?"

and then there's the invaluable LOL. bastardized to the point of nausea online, it serves as the perfect get out of jail ticket if you say something out of line. observe:
you're chatting with some hot girl and say:
"wow you're hot! I'm gonna trace your ISP and come knocking on your door to have my way with you"... she's calling the authorities on your ass!
BUT, add a LOL to the end of that, "wow you're hot! I'm gonna trace your ISP and come knocking on your door to have my way with you LOL" and she thinks you' re just a big harmless admirer.

add the 2 together, "geeze, you guys look like you were having a crazy time, what did you do for an encore after that LOL" and you'll be in boobie heaven.

and what do you mean cause you some trouble down the road. you mean with your wife? do you really think she'd be much less pissed off with the pic the babysitter already sent than with a nude one. maybe a bit, but it'd be in the same ballpark.

And that is all.

well yeah your right , it probably wouldnt cause any more trouble then the bra and panty pic , course thats not much worse then the bikini she wore when she was swimming here this summer , or even the naked boobs that are posted above of our old book keeper ... I might casually ask the sitter if shed care to share some nudes , but as you state above I will do it Tackful , ZYou Know like ( HEy you got some awesome titties there mind if I snap a couple pics of them ???? ) LOL well just stopped for a short lunch and fax some paper work . see ya later

well the friend called my wife today asked if I was going to help pay for her boob job , , I told my wife sure as long as I get to enjoy them after I pay for them , the wife slapped me , then called the friend and told her what i said , all I heard was , OKAY

DDD, that pic was fantastic. U are the man

at least you got the LOL in there

btw has your wife seen any of these pics?



and you're still married?

The wife has seen the pictures of the girls with the prom dresses on , none of the others , hell shed kill me of she saw the boob pics or the pics of the baby sitter in the lingerie ...

and yes still married , to be honest the wife and friend have spoke about it many times now , it seems the gal has been passed over 2 times now for promotion at work and she feels it is because of her small chest , the last promotion was a a double in salary and went to a very large breasted gal that hadnt worked in her department for more then 2 yrs and shes been there for 10 , i think basically she wants them to help build her self esteem , which I can understand and the fact that I can afford to help her I will and I will get to see the cleavage on a weekly basis ...

Thank you , Im just a self proclaimed pervert !!! NOT really just lucky

LOL... the 3 greatest letters to be grouped since NIN haha



If he is I dont know how

btw I still wouldnt help out that bird by paying for her new boobs.

And seriously, unscramble the faces of the other 2!

Well I look at it this way ,on the boobs , We spend allot of time with her so i will get to see the cleavage allot and Im guessing even more , just think of the heads that will turn when she and my S/O walk thru the mall or walk down the beach when were in Hawaii this feb .. I guess its a matter of helping a friend out to build her self esteem , she called my wife last night and said she had a apointment yesterday with the surgeon , he wants to give her a good sized D i dont know how many CC that is but for her its going to be a pretty big change , he will also relocate her nipples to the center as now they sag , He gave her a fake set to put in bra to see what she thought , and she told the wife her hubby about attacked her when she walked in with them on last night , that alone helped her make the decision ... and hell its only $4000. its not like its a life savings amount ...


I might go back and erase the extras faces I havent decided ....

Nine Inch Nails? That's one of your no name bands



I dunno bout you but I wouldn't want a woman with a great pair of tits that I paid for hanging out with me and MY wife. How can you get a good look at them. Your wife will probably watch you like a hawk to see if you are paying more attention to her new D-cups than you should be. why don't they just take out a loan? and if she thinks she has been passed over for promotions cuz of her tits, suggest that maybe it's her BJ skills that are lacking and you could help her out with that.

oh yeah, since $4000 isn't much to you, could I borrow $4000? This top official from the Nigerian government emailed saying that I could get millions if I just deposit a few thousand into their account for handling fees. Seems like a risk free venture to me!

well no matter weather I pay or not my wife knows Im going to look , she is just resigned to that , her policy is , you can window shop all ya want but ya better come home to buy , as far as the people borrowing money , they could but how do you borrow for boobs ? I had suggested that well her hubby has used most of there borrowing power starting a carpet laying busness .. I suggested she needs to spend some time on her knees to get the promotions , she just smiled and said ( I tried that ) Dont know if she did or not but I dont think it out of the question . her Id let her practice on me ...

If you had female boobs I might send ya the 4000. but since yours our male I cant make that loan ...... Sorry I descriminate ...

well then, loan her the money then, and provide her with a link to this place.

great idea but I fear she will bring the wife along .... and the wife took a check to her today shes getting them done next week I guess ... we shall see the 4 of us are going to the def leapard concert friday night in moline , so we shall see if its uncomfotable now that I have given them the money ....

geeze you guys go out on the town more often than lindsay lohan on a coke bender.

well thats why we need a baby sitter !!!! and dont know if I like the comparison there other then shes got great tits LOL

ahhh good point!

and correction--HAD great tits. I always thought she'd get hotter and hotter as she got a little older, then ol lindsay turned 18 and the rest is a train wreck of a history.

[attachmentid=30945]


well I probably should not have posted this , I got this via phone today , shes getting braver , good thing Im going to be gone this weekend ....... enjoy , trying to get the hands down but im guessing that wont happen and yes bondi the face is blacked out ,,