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Jokes, anyone got any good ones to tell?
foxy lady |
Apr 12 2006, 02:46 PM
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D Cup
Group: Members
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Joined: 14-March 06
From: St. Catherines - Niagara, Ontario
Member No.: 14,069
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The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven." Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with God." St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycle?" Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me...." God commented: "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?" Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally spoke, "Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?" God said, " Ah, yes." "Well ," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention:
1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds
3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble too much
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust
5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!
"Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."
God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.
"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours.
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It takes a bitch like me to love a bastard like him
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Posts in this topic
foxy lady Jokes Apr 12 2006, 02:46 PM diane26
:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: Apr 12 2006, 02:56 PM Bobaloo
Now I ride a harley, but here's a favorite of... Apr 12 2006, 02:59 PM foxy lady
:o :lol:
Good one :thumbup: Apr 12 2006, 03:00 PM foxy lady BEANS
I met a sweet gentleman and we fell in love... Apr 12 2006, 05:12 PM 7mary3 Late one night in a dark alley a snail was sliming... Apr 13 2006, 02:56 AM foxy lady
:lol: :thumbup: Apr 13 2006, 09:14 AM UncleBuck What do you call a one legged woman?
... Apr 13 2006, 11:28 PM Bobaloo So one atom says to another, "I think I'v... Apr 14 2006, 09:27 AM UncleBuck What do you get if you cross a donkey with a onion... Apr 14 2006, 10:06 AM Bobaloo
How 'bout if you cross an elephant with a rhi... Apr 14 2006, 10:35 AM Bobaloo Or...
What do you call a deer with no eyes
no-... Apr 14 2006, 10:36 AM Bobaloo Just emailed to me for my joke of the day. Though... Apr 14 2006, 11:12 AM natalie I heard a black comedian tell this one.
"You... Apr 14 2006, 07:34 PM foxy lady
:lol: :lol: Apr 15 2006, 12:51 PM Bobaloo So a guy goes into a psychiatrist's office wea... Apr 17 2006, 11:52 AM natalie A blonde girl comes home from school and asks her ... Apr 17 2006, 05:48 PM closeup Two sperm are swimming thru a womans body.
One spe... Apr 17 2006, 06:01 PM closeup Why can't Smokie the Bears wife get pregnant?
... Apr 17 2006, 06:08 PM natalie I've got a million of them.
One day the lord c... Apr 17 2006, 06:09 PM Bobaloo
funny but true Apr 17 2006, 06:15 PM Bobaloo staying with the adam and eve theme...
On the fir... Apr 17 2006, 06:20 PM Bobaloo
I just was emailed this joke, which I think is th... Apr 17 2006, 06:32 PM natalie I'm addicted now.
Two high school sweathearts... Apr 17 2006, 06:18 PM Bobaloo
Oh, great. So now my life story has become a jok... Apr 17 2006, 06:21 PM closeup Natalie, I didn't realize your favorite bone w... Apr 17 2006, 06:24 PM natalie There is more money being spent on breast implants... Apr 17 2006, 06:25 PM natalie Ok Ok last one.
A pastor wanted to raise money for... Apr 17 2006, 06:36 PM natalie
:shuwks: :shuwks:
LOL and I got all these... Apr 17 2006, 06:47 PM foxy lady I'm just so happy that my thread has caught on... Apr 18 2006, 03:54 PM Bobaloo
Oh, that's it. I was just thinking that I ne... Apr 18 2006, 03:58 PM foxy lady At the Superbowl
A man had 50 yard line tickets... Apr 18 2006, 03:58 PM foxy lady The year is 2222 and after accumulating enough fre... Apr 18 2006, 04:00 PM foxy lady This guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The ... Apr 18 2006, 04:04 PM natalie
LMFAO! :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: Apr 18 2006, 04:18 PM Bobaloo
that's a good one!!! Apr 18 2006, 04:35 PM 7mary3 Why can't a lesbian be on a diet and wear make... Apr 19 2006, 10:21 AM foxy lady
:roflmao: Apr 19 2006, 12:40 PM diane26 For those of you who are not "fortunate... Apr 19 2006, 11:49 PM foxy lady
:blink: Apr 20 2006, 09:35 AM diane26
All the sunglass smile's should be Option B... Apr 20 2006, 03:02 PM Bobaloo So there's a pirate who goes into a bar and he... Apr 20 2006, 04:07 PM foxy lady
:lol: Good one :thumbup: Apr 20 2006, 05:15 PM foxy lady Q. Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian s... Apr 20 2006, 11:02 AM Bobaloo
Hilarious x 2
:roflmao: Apr 20 2006, 11:08 AM Bobaloo Speaking of lesbians...
what do you call a lesbia... Apr 20 2006, 11:08 AM foxy lady
I need me one of those dinosaurs :P Apr 20 2006, 11:09 AM Bobaloo Or...
What do you call it when a girl goes in for... Apr 20 2006, 11:09 AM foxy lady
:roflmao: Did I mention that I suffer from p... Apr 20 2006, 11:13 AM Bobaloo
Suffer no more. you can "have" mine. ... Apr 20 2006, 11:15 AM foxy lady :lol: Apr 20 2006, 11:17 AM foxy lady Flasher
There were three little old ladies sitti... Apr 20 2006, 11:23 AM boanna
i dont get it Apr 20 2006, 02:02 PM foxy lady
A stroke :whatever: :whatever:
The third one... Apr 20 2006, 02:05 PM foxy lady Nude Gallery
A couple goes to an art gallery. The... Apr 20 2006, 11:26 AM boanna
men! Apr 20 2006, 01:59 PM natalie To prove his love for her, he swam the deepest riv... Apr 20 2006, 01:55 PM boanna
omg. i am so slow. i was just gonna ask u where t... Apr 20 2006, 02:00 PM foxy lady Girls night out
Two women friends had gone out fo... Apr 20 2006, 05:19 PM closeup Did you hear about the flasher who was going to re... Apr 21 2006, 11:41 AM closeup Two women are riding bikes to a friend's house... Apr 21 2006, 12:24 PM Bobaloo A blind guy walks into a bar and finds a stool at ... Apr 21 2006, 03:28 PM foxy lady Cowboy and Cowgirl
One day, a young cowboy and a... Apr 24 2006, 02:59 PM natalie
:roflmao: :roflmao: LMFAO Apr 24 2006, 03:00 PM Bobaloo
DOes that really work??? Apr 24 2006, 03:07 PM natalie
Why are you having trouble untying your knots? :... Apr 26 2006, 02:25 PM natalie Go to WifemeetsGirlfriend.wmv. Very funny!... Apr 26 2006, 02:26 PM foxy lady There is something unusual about these words, see ... Apr 26 2006, 08:10 PM Bobaloo Here was my joke of the day:
A gas station owner ... Apr 27 2006, 09:42 AM foxy lady :lol: :lol: :lol: Apr 27 2006, 04:39 PM foxy lady American Beer
This guy goes to a doctor and says ... May 1 2006, 12:33 AM big_b Three boys eating lunch at school. The first boy s... May 3 2006, 10:54 AM foxy lady
I would've just left the shade open :lol: May 3 2006, 11:17 AM Bobaloo Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll ... May 3 2006, 11:50 AM foxy lady
:lol: May 3 2006, 11:54 AM evade20
But Barbie wasn't even married to Ken... :huh... May 4 2006, 08:13 AM Bobaloo
Yeah, that Barbie sure got around. i know she le... May 4 2006, 11:51 AM natalie
Yeah she did him while he got her friend Midge p... May 4 2006, 03:43 PM natalie A blond was driving in the country admiring the sc... May 4 2006, 03:54 PM foxy lady Wife saves Drunk Husband
------------------------... May 4 2006, 04:11 PM Bobaloo
now that's a good wife. May 4 2006, 04:43 PM Just Hangin
Good one hun :2thumbsup: May 5 2006, 04:00 PM foxy lady A GAY MAN'S FINAL CHANCE AT FUN!
Three A... May 5 2006, 01:40 PM natalie Bondi might like this one.
A texan farmer goes t... May 5 2006, 03:51 PM foxy lady :lol: May 5 2006, 03:55 PM Bobaloo Good one, Nat.
here's my joke of the day. It... May 5 2006, 03:58 PM foxy lady
Talk about being between a rock and a hard plac... May 5 2006, 04:00 PM Bobaloo Here's my new joke of the day:
A man setting ... May 10 2006, 02:28 PM natalie
Ok Austin Powers not that funny. :P May 10 2006, 04:15 PM Bobaloo
Hey, I just copied and pasted the joke of the day... May 10 2006, 04:21 PM natalie She married and had 13 children. Her husband died.... May 11 2006, 03:45 PM foxy lady
:roflmao: May 11 2006, 04:57 PM foxy lady Funeral Funny!
A cardiologist died and was g... May 16 2006, 08:53 PM belicked6924
:roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: May 16 2006, 09:34 PM Bobaloo
absolutely hilarious!!! May 19 2006, 09:04 PM Bobaloo And oldie but goodie
1-800-PSYCHIC
Hello, Welcome... May 22 2006, 03:55 PM Bobaloo Here's my joke of the day. Not funny, but it ... May 23 2006, 10:30 AM foxy lady
:lol: May 23 2006, 04:51 PM Bobaloo Here's one the kids can tell...
A gorilla wal... May 25 2006, 08:41 AM
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