new soldier in war on terror

[quote=boanna,Jul 10 2006, 04:54 PM]

someone finish this story for me, with a happy ending. if i like your ending, make sure to include directions to the nearest national forest to you, for me.



Ahh, we all know how the story is supposes to end. It is just a matter of getting there. The whole thing would be new between and thus exciting in its own way. So, how about I just name the place...the Ozark National Scenic Riverway.

captain

dressing ring (PA piercing)

Dear Penis is quite the hilarious ditty.

My embarassing band is Right Said Fred

mostly German with some native american, scott

wrestling

My most recent favorite would be Rhona Mitra.

warming

Why can't a lesbian be on a diet and wear make-up at the same time?


Because she can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on her face.

Late one night in a dark alley a snail was sliming his way home. A turtle approached and street robbed the snail at gun point. The police arrived to investigate and the detective asked the snail to tell him what happened. The snail said, "Well...I don't know... it all happened so fast."

a peeler

Why can't I ever catch that when pulling over speeder? alas

You definately go.

Suzy Q's

skinnydipping is always a good time.

There is a certain expectation of privacy. Some folks do not realize that at night people can see inside their house if they have the lights on as they can barely see outside. Most folks however... know. They do appear before the window for the purpose of being veiwed.

So, enjoy the show.

disco ball

Dr. Ruth

Okay, Bobaloo brought up cow tipping. I thought I would relate a story that is amusing now but not at the time. Since them I have become really apprehensive of birds of prey.

One snowy winter morning I went to a house to help animal control with a mature red tailed hawk that was in a fenced back yard. This hawk was able to fly for about 50 feet at a time and could not fly over the 4 foot chain link fence.

So, I jump the fence and the animal control officer stays outside the fence (important clue that I missed ). He gives me a blanket and tells me to throw it on the hawk and cover it's eyes, than I can grab it. Now, I became really concerned about talons and beak flying at me.

I open the blanket and slowly advance on this hawk. Three times I toss the blanket and each time it falls just in front of the hawk, only to jump back as it rocked back on it's tail feathers, screamed, and extended its talons towards me.

This whole time the family with kids was watching this dumb cop try to catch a hawk. Well, one of the kids opens the patio door and calls out to his dad. That is when their blue tick hound runs out into the yard and gets nose to beak with this hawk. Everyone is calling for the dog to get away from this agitated bird. Before I can say "this ain't gonna be good." the hawk takes flight, lands on the dogs back, digs in those talons, and rides the dog around the yard as this poor dog is howling and running for shelter.

Thank god for sphincter muscles because it is here that I nearly shat myself. I did finally pin the bird to the ground with a large broken tree limb. Someone else then cover the bird with a blanket and grabbed it. whew!

Hullab, good one. Cow tipping no...can't say I've ever done that. I've been told its great fun until it gets up charges at you.

The last time I was close to a bovine it was a bull that got loose in a residential area. The animal control officer told me to just walk up to it and yell while waiving my arms. This thing was almost as big as my squad car. As you can imagine I did not get much accomplished.

Holy sun burn batman. I know I am late in getting to this. Thanks for the pic, those are so hot.

The St. Pat's sobriety check point along with another rollover plus dual ejection vehicle incident has kept me away.

What a great way to start out a Friday and St. Patrick's Day on top of that. Just watch out for the pesky sobriety check points with all those cops trying to give you a "breathalizer."

"Hi I'm Bob and this is Boog and we're the Aloo brothers!"

Howdy and welcome from the big cow town of Kansas City.