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RMM Message Board _ Sex Talk _ Small Problem In The Bedroom
Posted by: sussed2 Dec 29 2005, 09:55 PM
Ok so....
Me and the man seem to have this problem in the bedroom that isn't going away.
He doesn't last very long. Now I have never been one to enjoy long sex sessions but I'd like at least 15 or 20 mins!
I thought it would be something that would go away at first because most of my past boyfriends have started off this way (the first few times) but eventually built up a tolerance. But it's been about 3 months now and it hasn't really improved....
He says he's baffled because he's never had this problem before and we thought that if we practiced a lot (lol) it would go away... but sadly it hasn't *sigh*.
We've tried wearing 2 condoms, waiting 20 minutes then going at it again, him trying to think of something else, different positions... but nothing seems to work.
Any suggestions folks?!
Anyone have any insight onto why this could be happening? What am I doing wrong?!
Posted by: sweetnsexy Dec 29 2005, 10:16 PM
Sussed....I suspect that you are doing nothing more than looking so gorgeous that few men lucky enough to touch could last long without exploding.....!!
Assuming that the issue is an early discharge rather than an early collapse, then there are techniques (so I understand) to extend the play time!
They tend to involve desensitising the situation as much as the distressed member...I believe you start by having body contact that does not involve penetration or direct stimulation...at all. Then you graduate to touching...and finally to full sex.....but at each stage cooling off at the point of no return...I am sure you can find a more technical guide somewhere, but the essence appears to be controlling the situation and slowing it down...
Good luck!!
Posted by: closeup Dec 29 2005, 10:23 PM
Well, where to start? The first thing that jumps out at me is this: SAYING it's never happened before and NOT having it happen before are two different things, one having nothing to do with the other. I'm sure you've probably tried this next idea, but maybe not, have him take care of himself first for the "easy" one. There's a real good chance you're the hottest woman he's ever been with and he's sort of intimidated being with you. And lastly, why do you think you might be doing something wrong? There's no right and wrong, there's only what happens, right and wrong are just names we give to the outcome. Hopefully, the guy knows it's important for you to get yours and makes sure that happens regardless of his "problem"
Posted by: belicked6924 Dec 29 2005, 10:54 PM
The only thing that's worked for me in the past was to change postitions frequently, most importantly before reaching climax. If that doesn't work try the 3 to 4 times a night, cause it doesn't sound like there's a problem with multiples.
Posted by: bondiguy Dec 30 2005, 01:46 AM
Sussed, from a guys point of view fuck I can understand your mans problem... I mean LOOK AT YOU! haha
Seriously though sweets suggestions are great for extended pleasure, and changing positions like the monkey said also works, because its like stopping before climax, but you have all the fun of changing positions.
I have never been a fan of thinking of something else, sex is supposed to be enjoyed!
Why dont you have him go down on you until orgasm, then he can shoot nice and early. However, if it is prolonged penetration you are after have him pull out a few times, change positions or get a vibe out and start proceedings with him watching and work yourself into a bother then let him take you all the way!
Fuck now I need a cold cold shower.
P.S I am always willing to give in house tutoring. haha. I'll get you started and he can finish the job! Im willing to share 
Posted by: jrock8 Dec 30 2005, 02:27 AM
alright, i'm gonna bypass the "sussed you're totally hot and i think everyone can understand why it's happening... " comments b/c you obviously know how i feel
2 thoughts:
1) spend more time w/you on top... sorry to get technical, but if he's on his back, the blood flows away from his penis and should keep him going longer.
2) they make condoms that have a numbing agent in the tip that will desensitize him slightly (it's on the inside so it'll only affect him, not you)... take a look at the durex performa, for example.
hopefully this helps... b/c god forbid a body like that isn't getting fully satisfied.
Posted by: bondiguy Dec 30 2005, 02:30 AM
2) they make condoms that have a numbing agent in the tip that will desensitize him slightly (it's on the inside so it'll only affect him, not you)... take a look at the durex performa, for example.
hopefully this helps... b/c god forbid a body like that isn't getting fully satisfied.
I have heard of those condoms! To be honest i haven't worn a rubber in years... they are fucking technical now, you can even get ones that vibrate!
Posted by: paybarraman Dec 30 2005, 08:22 AM
My two cents........
Follow Sweets advice......it sounds as though you two need to look into tantric areas.......There are techniques he can work on to hold off the actual ejaculation without going into the whole "Orgasm without ejaculating" aspect of tantric....
Thing is, this isnt something that can be "fixed" quickly, it'll involve time and work and your assistance - which could in NO WAY be a problem Im sure.
As for changing the positions, sure it can help delay him, but at the same time, you could actually be getting close and then BOOM, gone and have to start over again......
**************
Now for all you schmucks that will give me grief about "Pay aint havin sex....how in the hell does he know?"
Well......I used to have sex and I have the same "Minute Man" issues and have looked into how to change things. Tantric exercises can work but it takes a while.
Posted by: juicy_DD Dec 30 2005, 09:35 AM
it could be something as simple as he doesnt feel all that comfortable with you yet...after all a couple of months isnt that long to have been with someone! especially if he is really into you take time to get to know each other out of the bedroom and dont place too much improtance on sex and LASTING! what I would suggest is to let him know how much you think of him even when it happens and to tell him it doesnt matter....the times when you dont see him have phone sex and tell him what you want to do when you do see him...I dont know perhaps this might work! 
Posted by: COMEDYMAN Dec 30 2005, 09:55 AM
Fuck all this advice.... before sex kick him in the balls real hard.... 
j/k
All of the suggestions are great and its nothing you are doing hun except just turning your man on severely 
Not that I say take drugs... But there are certain SSRI-class antidepressants like Zoeloft which a side effect is trouble reaching orgasm... I dunno if this would help for a quick shooter and i would definately talk to a doc about it... mebbe they have taken that side effect and made it its own pill... worth a shot tho to check it out.
Posted by: imagonsgirl Dec 30 2005, 10:43 AM
two words....cock ring,get one at your local sexshop,keeps the blood in the penis and keeps you from ejaculating until want to remove,also get some stamina rx pills...will keep him hard for 1 to 2 hours regardless of ejaculation.
Posted by: bondiguy Dec 30 2005, 06:17 PM
I have just had a brain wave.... we should all start a radio programme dishing out sexual advice to callers... maybe an internet radio show?
We'd make millions! 
Posted by: sussed2 Dec 30 2005, 07:39 PM
Thank you all for the suggestions.... We'll try a few of those and see what happens.
(thanks to those who pm'ed me their suggestions too 
)
Practise makes perfect I guess!
Posted by: countryboykalamazoo Dec 31 2005, 01:24 AM
There are creams out there too, but from what I hear, when you put in on the guy, he loses all sensation on his dick, so if thats the case it would help, but you might want to invest in a cock ring to work in conjunction with the cream. Some how I don't believe not feeling it probably wouldn't stop him, just because the thought of you would be enough, maybe banding his nuts??????? 
Posted by: Mezrein Jan 1 2006, 06:49 PM
We'd make millions!
Hate to say it bondi, but there's already a radio show like that. It's called Loveline, with Adam Corala and Dr. Drew.
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 3 2006, 12:06 PM
Adam Corala of Man Show fmae hosts a sex advice show?! That would be hilarious if not particularly helpful, a lot like bondi
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 3 2006, 12:07 PM
oh yeah, I guess I should leave some advice too. Since pretty much all the good ideas have been covered, I'll say get him good and pissed first. I can go forever when drunk.
That is all.
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 3 2006, 02:01 PM
but not too drunk he can't get it up sussed... it's a fine line 
or, i still say stick w/the tried and true method... have him go down on you over and over 
... i don't know about your man, but i definitely would enjoy doing it to you
Posted by: Puppet Jan 3 2006, 09:57 PM
One word "KEGALS" have him look it up because im not explaining it...
Basically he lacks control of his prostate.. I learned about this when i was 15 I think from some sex ed book.. so i started practiceing way back then.. So the obvious puppet statement.. of .. if that doesn't work out come on over should be of no surprise..
it really does take a great amount of control to do a girl just right and make her have a huge squirting orgasm while making it feel good for you and not blowing your load... takes concentration to a degree!~
Posted by: bondiguy Jan 4 2006, 03:01 AM
Oh yeah they have shows like that here in Australia too, but imagine how twisted yet funny we would be on the radio? haha
Posted by: Puppet Jan 4 2006, 03:53 AM
no thats fucked up and scary you mean
Posted by: sussed2 Jan 5 2006, 09:22 PM
Thanks again folks!!! Nothing has worked yet but then again we havent been sleeping together much lately....
Puppet - I've heard of Kegal excersises (I do them every day) but I didnt realize men could do the same. I'll mention it to him.
Cheers!
Posted by: bondiguy Jan 6 2006, 12:39 AM
Puppet - I've heard of Kegal excersises (I do them every day) but I didnt realize men could do the same. I'll mention it to him.
Cheers!
I am going to do the only honourable thing to do, I will volunteer for you to use me as a piece of meat for your sexual pleasure... and after you have been satisfied numerous times, I'll allow your man to take over! How noble of me! haha
Posted by: Puppet Jan 6 2006, 08:54 AM
yea.. have him take a look.. when the prostate gets weak you lose the ability to control the shot.. as well as the urge to shoot.. and as we know once you hit the point of no return .. everyone watch out...
and the fact that you actively Kegal... 
ohyeaaaa
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 01:40 PM
Puppet - I've heard of Kegal excersises (I do them every day) but I didnt realize men could do the same. I'll mention it to him.
Cheers!
all the other ladies here, take note... i was w/a girl that did kegel excercises, and the first time she did it while i was inside her, it was like "holy shit! what the fuck was that?"... it was awesome, like her pussy was squeezing my dick... now THAT is a cool trick if i do say so myself
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 6 2006, 01:45 PM
kegal exercises are covered in graphic and masturbation worthy detail in Seymore Butt's Complete Guide to Female Ejacualtion. I trust it was on everyone's Holiday DVD Wishlist
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 01:55 PM
i didn't get my copy... i think santa kept it... that horny bastard!
Posted by: Imagirlwatcher Jan 6 2006, 01:57 PM
He must've gotten tired of cumming only once a year.
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 02:05 PM
exxxxcellent...
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 6 2006, 02:13 PM
ROFL
yeah even Santa should empty his sack more often
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 02:14 PM
but wouldn't shrinkage be a bitch up at the north pole? 
Posted by: Imagirlwatcher Jan 6 2006, 03:02 PM
Yea, no shit. I imagine that's why Mrs. Claus is there, you know, to warm his cockels. It's not like she does anything else up there.
Although I did hear that she and the elves have been known to fool around while Santa is out delivering the goods. But I ain't one to gossip... 
Posted by: Narazbad Jan 6 2006, 05:07 PM
rofl.......elf sex.....ha ha.....
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 05:09 PM
hey, i'm sure having elves around has its benefits... for one, the girl elves don't need to worry about hurting their knees 
(oh yeah, and sussed... i hope all of this helps w/your guy's problem )
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 6 2006, 05:10 PM
*quietly tiptoes out of thread*
Posted by: Narazbad Jan 6 2006, 05:12 PM
EY! GET YER ASS BACK HERE AND TELL SUSSED HOW TO MAKE HER MAN LAST LONGER! while i supervise and laugh randomly at stupid statements! (cuz i sure as fuck dont have much experience to say about*
Posted by: Gnappster Jan 6 2006, 05:18 PM
C'mon Naraz don't be so humble, how do you make your guy last longer?
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 6 2006, 05:18 PM
HAHAHAHA
i think he uses elves too
Posted by: Narazbad Jan 6 2006, 05:19 PM
fuck.....you......,,!,,
Posted by: Imagirlwatcher Jan 6 2006, 05:20 PM
That's ok man. Keep it to yoursELF.
Posted by: Narazbad Jan 6 2006, 05:29 PM
rofl...assholes!
Posted by: bondiguy Jan 6 2006, 07:35 PM
BOOYA!
Nice one Gnappy
Posted by: Puppet Jan 6 2006, 09:43 PM
hahahahh own3d
Posted by: Narazbad Jan 9 2006, 12:40 AM
damnit!
Posted by: bondiguy Jan 9 2006, 02:01 AM
Im afraid he's got you by the balls there
Posted by: jrock8 Jan 9 2006, 03:31 AM
hopefully he'll be gentle though...
Posted by: bondiguy Jan 11 2006, 12:22 AM
I dont think he knows how to be gentle... just ask Pay... Gnappy turned his big and colourful!
Posted by: Arnut Nov 29 2019, 08:07 AM
Me and the man seem to have this problem in the bedroom that isn't going away.
He doesn't last very long. Now I have never been one to enjoy long sex sessions but I'd like at least 15 or 20 mins!
I thought it would be something that would go away at first because most of my past boyfriends have started off this way (the first few times) but eventually built up a tolerance. But it's been about 3 months now and it hasn't really improved....
He says he's baffled because he's never had this problem before and we thought that if we practiced a lot (lol) it would go away... but sadly it hasn't *sigh*.
We've tried wearing 2 condoms, waiting 20 minutes then going at it again, him trying to think of something else, different positions... but nothing seems to work.
Any suggestions folks?!
Anyone have any insight onto why this could be happening? What am I doing wrong?!
Posted by: Arnut Nov 29 2019, 08:13 AM
Nothing you're doing at all.he needs to get a better diet. A lot more protein cut out the red meat, greens,, potassium a lot of bananas Oat Bran cereal,,Water at least six bottle Waters a day... and after he gets off don't let him come inside you.. he need to get down there and eat your pussy, letting his dick get hard again don't let it get all the way hard .. sticking it in slow stroke for 5-10 minutes everything should be good
Posted by: Karatenami Nov 29 2019, 11:10 AM
I think this is the funniest thread ive ever read lol.
Great advice everyone..
Soo.. for those that dont know, my husband is a martial arts master, he owned 3 martial arts schools at one point, and achieved Mastery after 13 years of daily martial arts practice under a grandmaster who had been training well over 50 years for half of that 13...
I tell you his credentials because as his wife, i confess he lasts longer in the bedroom than anyone ive ever been with [which is a small number, admittedly] but anyone ive heard of either..so
He says believe it or not. The old Kama sutra books work if you study them
Yes relationships take time, and the sexual pillar is one of the three pillars a successful relationship needs. So many women out there just believe great sex isnt for them [ i was one] and that it doesnt exist, or that something must be wrong with them.. its not true.
As a martial artist myself, ive taught myself breathing exercises and stuff to raise my own endurance because hubby out lasts me every time.
When i say kama sutra, i mean the actual.. like.. study book lol.. there are thousands of just porn style knock offs lol.. ive never read it, but hubby explained it all to me in detail, about elephant, horse, mule etc etc..
Anyway! If the man is worth it, keep practicing! Make a rule where you have to finish first before he can! Lol..
Rule one: make sure everyone is happy
Sorry for the rant! /EndRant
Posted by: Ronglass Nov 29 2019, 12:30 PM
Great advice everyone..
Soo.. for those that dont know, my husband is a martial arts master, he owned 3 martial arts schools at one point, and achieved Mastery after 13 years of daily martial arts practice under a grandmaster who had been training well over 50 years for half of that 13...
I tell you his credentials because as his wife, i confess he lasts longer in the bedroom than anyone ive ever been with [which is a small number, admittedly] but anyone ive heard of either..so
He says believe it or not. The old Kama sutra books work if you study them
Yes relationships take time, and the sexual pillar is one of the three pillars a successful relationship needs. So many women out there just believe great sex isnt for them [ i was one] and that it doesnt exist, or that something must be wrong with them.. its not true.
As a martial artist myself, ive taught myself breathing exercises and stuff to raise my own endurance because hubby out lasts me every time.
When i say kama sutra, i mean the actual.. like.. study book lol.. there are thousands of just porn style knock offs lol.. ive never read it, but hubby explained it all to me in detail, about elephant, horse, mule etc etc..
Anyway! If the man is worth it, keep practicing! Make a rule where you have to finish first before he can! Lol..
Rule one: make sure everyone is happy
Sorry for the rant! /EndRant
Not really a rant lol. More good advice if you ask me. It takes two to make it work , I've always worked on the theory that I need to make the other person ' fulfilled'
Posted by: Arnut Nov 29 2019, 12:32 PM
Great advice everyone..
Soo.. for those that dont know, my husband is a martial arts master, he owned 3 martial arts schools at one point, and achieved Mastery after 13 years of daily martial arts practice under a grandmaster who had been training well over 50 years for half of that 13...
I tell you his credentials because as his wife, i confess he lasts longer in the bedroom than anyone ive ever been with [which is a small number, admittedly] but anyone ive heard of either..so
He says believe it or not. The old Kama sutra books work if you study them
Yes relationships take time, and the sexual pillar is one of the three pillars a successful relationship needs. So many women out there just believe great sex isnt for them [ i was one] and that it doesnt exist, or that something must be wrong with them.. its not true.
As a martial artist myself, ive taught myself breathing exercises and stuff to raise my own endurance because hubby out lasts me every time.
When i say kama sutra, i mean the actual.. like.. study book lol.. there are thousands of just porn style knock offs lol.. ive never read it, but hubby explained it all to me in detail, about elephant, horse, mule etc etc..
Anyway! If the man is worth it, keep practicing! Make a rule where you have to finish first before he can! Lol..
Rule one: make sure everyone is happy
Sorry for the rant! /EndRant
Posted by: Karatenami Nov 30 2019, 10:30 AM
No need, this has nothing to do with martial arts.
Literally its significantly closer to Buddhist "present moment awareness" and mindfulness.
Couple breathing exercises and this dude could easily go 5 minutes longer without trying, 20 if he did try.
Thats it, Kara the sex counselor open for business! Jk jk...
Any exercise is better than zero, never beat yourself up for doing less than you want, instead, change that to " im doing this today" and do it.
Ok so during any physical activity, when breathing, breathe out whenever you are exerting force of any kind... so.. lifting, stepping up onto a rock, thrusting into your wife
, pushing a box or pulling a box, lifting a bag of groceries.. these are all exhales. Your body doesnt need inhales as much as it needs exhales. Your body will inhale what it requires, however, we tend to hold our breathe when we exert force, and this is not great in many ways, during sex for example, it causes muscle fatigue and loss of stamina, also, it can make you finish faster. Breathing controls %80 more things then we think it does with any physical activity, see? No martial arts in that lol
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